Be better than who I was yesterday.
Well, the late April showers continue to water the UK gardens and fill our rivers. We can rely on the weather to keep us on our toes and dealing with changes.
People are returning to the office and this is drumming up all sorts of different conversations and feelings such as insecurities and anxiety. And so, I wanted to use this week’s newsletter to help you not overthink things that may put you into a state of unnecessary stress.
Now is not the time to focus on impressing others, impress yourself! Go for your stretch and do a daily “check in” to enable you to be the best version of yourself.
There are three things I want to share that may be helpful in keeping yourself sane and well:
- Imposter Syndrome
Self-love is such a large subject, yet I wanted to point out how important it is to be able to do this. Self-love is the balance between accepting yourself as you are while knowing that you deserve better, and then working towards it.
Then we have the Ego that sometimes gets in our way of getting ahead or getting the results we are seeking. The ego is a social mask and one that constantly requires validation because it lives in fear of losing its identity. When you are upset because someone doesn’t like you, it’s your ego operating. You are validating your existence based on their approval. Really? You need their approval? Come back to loving yourself and being comfortable in your own skin. Be happy to step into your truth.
And then Imposter Syndrome. We all experience this from time to time and it may be helpful to identify with the different types as listed below. It is a reflection of a belief that you’re inadequate and an incompetent failure even though you have evidence that confirms that you are skilled and successful. See if you recognize yourself in any of the 5 types below and note the little tip provided.
The Perfectionist – Good never feels enough. Struggle with delegating, micromanage or feel your work needs to be 100% correct, 100% of the time. This person experiences stress, anxiety, and doubt if they feel things are not perfect. Not a lot of Self-love and self-praise going on here. Tip: Accept that mistakes are part of growth.
The Expert – (I may be guilty of this one myself.) Believing they will never know enough for fear of being exposed as inexperienced or unknowledgeable. As a trainer, this is always in your head not knowing who is in the room😊. Imagine not knowing all the answers! Tip: Learn only what you need for now and deal with the next step if and when it comes along.
The Natural Genius – Ah, expecting to get it right first time, every time. A dose of shame is felt when setbacks happen and ultimately impacting confidence. Tip: Give yourself more time to hone the skills. It is ok.
The Soloist – Believes that they “should” be able to do it all alone. Asking for help will mean that they are incompetent. Tip: Ask for help. Your colleagues want to help you. Get a coach.
The Superhero – Pushing themselves so hard and refuse to turn down work as it is not acceptable to show weakness. Addicted to the validation that comes from working, not to the work itself. Tip: Do not take things personally and remember that no one should have more power to make you feel good about yourself than you!
I hope that is helpful to you or perhaps you recognized someone as you scanned through this? If so, forward this to them if you think it will help.